It’s a promise that we can take those existing archaic structures and undermine them by being in an open relationship, by lying about my gender (which is how I’ve come to think of it) on my legal documents, and by making everyone bring food to the wedding. (Booze is provided, however.) It is a promise that love is not synonymous with control, but in fact with freedom. It’s a promise to work really hard to take power from the active redefinition of the role of marriage and commitment in our life together.
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